I'm glad the World Cup's over for India.
And here are 13 good reasons for it - upside down!
13) Because we will not have to sit through
one more rerun of Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy's mushy mind-and-body heart-and-soul
ditty for Visa. Or drink another frightful bottle of Pepsi gold. Or wear
that silly blue band.
12) Because the Heroes of '83 - Kapil Dev
and Mohinder Amarnath and Syed Kirmani and K. Srikkanth and Yashpal Sharma
and even Sunil Valson - will get another chance to play the de vils who
could do no wrong in 2011.
11) Because we can objectively judge how
good Fit-Kit, Orient PSPO, Anchor switches, HP Power and all the wondrous
products endorsed by our stars are without their stardom influencing our
decision-making.
10) Because we now get time to memorise
the names of the top-six Ireland batsmen because they will get six, yes
six, more chances than the "world's strongest batting line-up"
to walk out to the middle.
9) Because Shah Rukh Khan and Priyanka Chopra
and the rest of Bollywood won't have to mouth silly good luck messages,
and they can resume wishing themselves and their movies good luck.
8) Because we won't have to take part in
any more milk-them-when-we-can signature or SMS campaigns, and we can all
get back to the country's national sport: forwarding jokes.
7) Because Mandira Bedi will now get some
time to take care of whatever it is that is causing her to look the way
she is looking. If it means Botox, so be it, bring the Mandira of 2003
back before the Supe r Eight begins.
6) Because the high-fliers who have been
sent by their companies to warm the corporate boxes can come back early
and start working on making the fourth-quarter results look better.
5) Because Rajdeep Sardesai's CNN-IBN can
stop being the Official Channel of the Indian Fan and try to be what it
should be: an objective news channel which has a sense of balance and priority.
Or, sorry, was that NDTV?
4) Because K. Srikkanth and Navjot Sidhu
and Ajay Jadeja and Surinder Khanna and Nayan Mongia and Madan Lal can
go back to their wives (and check their bank balances) this side of midnight.
3) Because we can now enjoy the cricket
the way it should be - cheering for those who do well, marvelling at how
they do it - without being breathlessly asked by some imbecile every few
minutes, 'Sachin kitna maara?'
2) Because we can tuck our India Shining/India
Rising crap in our suitcases for another four years and get back to being
what we really are: coasters who don't have the same high expectations
from an ybody else, least of all ourselves.
1) Because we can now understand at great
leisure that there are more countries than ours which play the greatest
game in the solar system. And that the richest cricket body doesn't necessarily
have to produce the best cricket.
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