Best Jokes.!!!!.....Read when you are bit free....

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Man was smoking in a bus.
Conductor: No Smoking ka board nahin dikhta?
Man: Uske side mein 'Always Wear Condom' ka board hai, ab vo bhi laga ke baithoon?


Boy: If I press ur boobs & run, what'll u think?
Girl: I'll think... Ek bewakoof, jo puri car chala sakta tha, sirf horn daba ke bhag gaya.


A lady from 2nd floor asking a bananawala: Kaise diye (How Much)?
Bananawala: Memsaab Aath (8) mein Bara (12).[12 banana's for da price of 8]
Lady: Saat (7) mein Tera (13) deta hai to oopar aaja.


Man: Doc mera khada nahi hota hai.
Doc: R u married?
NO.
Do u hv a g/f?
NO.
Do u go to prostitutes?
NO.
Doc: To khada karke kya calander tangega?


Bhagwan ko gussa kab aata hai?
Jab kisi ladki ka rape hone ke baad uski ma bolti hai, "Hey Bhagwan yeh tune kya kiya."


Latest porn releases: Shaving Private Ryan, Position Impossible, As Big As
It Gets, Forest Hump, Riding Miss Daisy, Starwhores and Pornocchio.


Doctor: You look terribly weak and exhausted! R u having your meals 3
times a day as I advised?
Lady: Doctor, I thought you said three males a day.


Ever wondered why A, B, C, D, E & F are used for bra sizes?
A: Almost boobs
B: Barely there
C: Can do
D: Damn good
E: Enormous
and F for Fake.


When nobody luvs u, nobody cares 4 u, nobody think about u, every1 ignores
u, then go n sit in the corner close ur eyes n think: Bhanch*d Chakar kya hai?


Customer: Excuse me, but how can this tiny little hand bag cost so much?
Cashier: It`s made of foreskin madam, when u lick it, it becomes a suit case!


In chemistry class teacher asked a gal: What r nitrates?
Ladki ne sharma ke kaha: Night rates r costlier then day.


During a sexual session, the gal says: U r like a mobile phone!
He asks: Do I vibrate a lot?
Gal: No, when u get into the tunnel, u loose signal.


How do Municipal Buses help in Family Planning?
By spreading the Message: KRIPYA PEECHHE SE CHADHIYE


Common statements by girls after the exam & the wedding night: Thoda
Mushkil tha lekin Achcha tha, Kaafi lamba bhi tha, Thak gayee, Aata tha lekin theek se kar nahin paayi....


Jab Gabbar paida hua to uski maan ne us se 3-4 thappad lagaye
Gabbar's Father: Kya baat ho gayi?
Mother: Kambakht paida hote hi pooch raha tha KTNE AADMI THE...



Man: Mistriji, bed majboot banana, mere bete ko bahu ke saath sona hai.
Mistri: Aisa majboot banaunga ki saara mohalla Bahu ke saath soye to bhi nahin tootega



A fat electrician while having sex asks her wife: Bolo priye tumhe kya gam hai?
Wife: Swami Load Jyada aur Voltage kam hai


What's the similarity between drinking a coke & sucking a tall woman's tits?
Piyo sar utha ke...


Ladki apni marzi se de to Pyar,
Dost dilaen to Uphaar,
Ghar wale dilaen to Sanskaar
Aur hum apne aap le lein to Balatkaar


Ek sawaal: Duniya ka sabse mushkil kaam kya hai?
Jawaab: Soye huye pappu par condom chadhaana.


For toothpaste ad they show teeth.
For hair oil they show hair.
For face cream they show face.
But for Whisper they r not showing anything,

That's cheating. Jaago Grahak Jaago

Daru peene wale ke liye AUR nahi peene walo ke liye -ek matra jagah--  "MadhuShala...A Religious Place..."

http://www.orkut.com/Community.aspx?cmm=15161356
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